TimeLine

* LOVE * PEACE * JOY *

Sunday, July 18, 2004

What do u do, when u don’t know what to do?

Haha! It’s a little confusing right? Let say, u know u r, most likely, falling for someone. (U know!) it’s not going to work but u just can’t get away from it. It’s hanging on your neck everywhere u go. U can’t breath. One thing for sure, if u don’t leave now, you will be terribly hurt. U have had enough of pain. U tried to stay away from love that might cost you pain, much pain. God knows y! u were thrown into this shit. (that’s when u should left, if not) It will led u deeper and then finally u think the “fairy-tale” is going to happen to me~ u were too naïve to believe that nonsense. As soon as u know it, it’s time for u to make your exit, for someone to take over you. But u couldn’t move! u r in too deep to jump out. U have no choice now, he has no room for u. U couldn’t stay anymore. It’s cruel but very realistic. So u cry, scream and vent anger on everyone including yourself. Ironically, (anger) that’s the only motivation u r left with. After a try and another, u never stops waking up… Each go, u used all your energy and pride to drag yourself slowly out of this shit. It’s a very very slow journey as each time u jump, u will cut yourself. It keeps cutting on the same wound and it just gets deeper and deeper that blood gush out. There’s no way to mend this wound now, u are still jumping, cutting and bleeding. After a big struggle, u finally touches the ground. By then u are so tired, so tired that u keep your eyes closed. U just want to catch your breathe. Things seems much simpler now that u r half out. U closed your eyes to sleep, the pain… the wound… is all coming back and it’s aching so much that u regret doing it to yourself! No pain, no gain. The sun rise and set and when u finally rested enough, u open your eyes and see yourself in a different time space. U blames yourself for missing out so much! Sitting on the ground you look back into the hole u have fallen into. “My gosh!”. You swear not to fall into a hole ever again. Once bitten, twice shy. Bring your weak soul, you stood up and make your first step into this new time zone. This time round, you walk the road very carefully, noting every turn n winding road. U stop frequently, more frequent than your heartbeats. In your mind…“No! don’t step into a hole again”
 
But can u do it?