Monday, June 19, 2006

The fear of loving once more
-by Sarah Leung

It’s strange how events of life take their turns on you. It always happen at the most unexpected place and time.

One and a half years ago, I was still grieving over the lost of a fruitless love. And ever since, I’ve been searching for some kind of peace to take me away from the blues and what happens one and a half years later? All my friends know that I want to find someone to share my life with but when someone comes along, I seem to be scared and fearful that it would turn out to be a nightmare in disguise. Just why is it so hard for me to fall in love again?

It was the late class on Monday again as I drag my body from workplace to class. Restlessly, I waited for the class to begin and more students are coming in to the lecture room. And there he came in with his backpack and sat next to me. He is like a stopwatch that makes the time seem running much faster. By the time we starts to understand a little bit of each other it was the last time we will be having class together.

I thought I’ll never see him again. I thought he is someone who only stops-over for awhile so I see no point in knowing him too well. To me, making friends in class is an absolute waste of time. And what’s the point when there are no drop-dead gorgeous guys in class?

But life has its way. It trapped me in the most difficult situation and gave me no sign to the exit. Now, I’ve learnt the only way to escape is to draw one myself.