Tuesday, November 30, 2004

"Care for a game or two?"
-by Sarah Leung

Given the uproar caused by the Singapore Idol, everyone now are educated to cast their votes! So to ride on this madness, I would like to start my topic for today with a simple poll. Here's the question- just how frequent have you tell your love ones you love them?

A. Huh... I beg your pardon?
B. None, why bothers when my partner didn't even say it to me!
C. Who cares? We know we love one another, (turn to look at your partner) right?!

No matter what you vote for, it reflects only one thing- Looks like your relationship is rocky!

In my opinion, sweet talking does set fire to a relationship. It is part of the game that keeps it burning! Many a times, love turns to cold water and you could hardly feel the heart-drumming moment. Majority would choose to ignore or make believe that it's a norm. Some go on the wrong track and mistook it for a change of heart. No sweat people, all you need is something refreshing & you will get it back to safety. But just how many people in Asia know how to play the game? Baby, it's all in the mind.

When I say games I don't mean "flings". Even though I have to admit that a little jealousy can generate sparks in your love arena, I would not encourage such a risky solution. You will end up living by yourself if you don't do it right. It is interesting to discover how your significant other reacts to your flirting. Conservative Asians define "flirting" as a disrespectful act of wild & cheap kid trying too hard to impress the opposite sex but it's not always the case. It depends on the audience you said it to.

A simple phrase may sound differently when you say it to your children, lover or even your parents. Just to cite an example, when you say "You smell great..." to the little one, you meant it as a praise for good hygiene practicing. And when you tell your dear that he/she smells great, to them it's not just a compliment, it has hidden sensuality that makes the words & sound of it sexy. As for the parent side, I don't think you want to know. Ha!

To play the game there is no rule (that's what attractive about it). So let the games begin with "I love you".

Monday, November 29, 2004

"The other side of me"
-by Sarah Leung

A big welcome to good old Monday! I hope your Blues are not running high. Glad to say that I'm feeling much better now. The storm had left. Last weekends were tough on me, a mixture of emotions almost tore me apart. Running into friends that I can't help but love more each day yet digging on the past that lead to bitter arguments. I don't think I can withstand yet another emotion disaster. It has proven to me it's too much to bear.

I didn't know I would react that way unlike me. I couldn't imagine my heart nearly stopped beating when I heard the truth. This is unbelievable for a composed girl like me. I am always calm to react but what has happened now? At home, I am depended on like a support that binds all members together and nevertheless it's me who is rational and calls the shot. Love really changes me.

It scares me sometimes when I realize the effect love has on me. I have become exceptionally, terrified of things that threat me before. However, some words are so hard to say it now. Pride has abandon me for my growing weakness. I have become less intimidating compared to the past when worries are written on my face.

Someone close once warn me, "in love it's not just about you, you have to think for him/her too." Indeed, you are right.

Friday, November 26, 2004

"I'm in middle of no-where"
-by Sarah Leung

The temperature is low here and so does my mood. I am in the right place. A solemn church I find within myself. This is the day that I didn't curse the poor weather nor the quiet happenings. I only need peace but it suffer like the sound of death. After a sleep, I felt deflated as the energy drain out of my body which is not suppose to be.

I hate to recall the argument last night that drove me to despair. It was bitterly awful. I couldn't find the reason as to why. What remains clear is that this is definitely not the time to ask for forgiveness and it is totally insignificant to be regretful. He don't seem to know when I refuse to speak. All I need is time to heal and put on back a smile.

Time flies and I have reached the pit fall again. My greatest fear is back to haunt me. This is only the time for White Christmas. This is the time when everything comes to an end. The people don't seem to be worried at all, they are happy for that it's Friday and weekends is just around the corner. For once, I want to be a follower, I hope to be influenced by them, I want to fill up the emptiness in me.

I have made a U-turn back to where I was.

I find myself withdrawing from the crowd, detest the look from people's eyes. I'm hiding away my insecurities. I've put a latch on my chest. I shall not utter a word because what I speak is only nuisances. Pretensions do not revealing the true me. Talking is such. I discover my soul living in the undertunnel. Not wanting to go.

Thursday, November 25, 2004

"Sorry! What did you say?"
-by Sarah Leung

Do you have the habit of saving for rainy days? Or have you ever considered this option? Now think again because frankly speaking, I'm a loser when it comes to spending. I never do save because I can't bear the sorrow of having a lesser pair of shoes, take away a bag or fewer pieces of clothing. They mean the world to me. Well, not all will understand my love for them. Let me explain, I define style as a life & death issue and I seek style in living. This often generate tons of needs. It's due to all these needs I want in life that burn a hole in my wallet.

Yesterday, after spoken to a dear one on financial planning, I'm well-convinced that we badly need a financial planner to save guard our finances. I agree with misers, a dollar a day can make a difference. Just think about the money you will have accumulated over 5 or 10 years? $365 a year, $1825 5 years later and $3650 after 10 years!

My love one and I are die-hard fan of shopping. We never need a second of consideration for getting on hand anything we want. May it be the latest handphone, travel package (shopping tours) or a pair of designer shade. Even though we never need to beg our parents for more allowance but this amount mostly gobble up the pie, bread, cheese and bacon! And what we left with is only the bone.

I've come across an interview with a senior financial advisor, he commented that it is encouraged to save 10% of the salary you draw each month. This is merely to keep your risk of bankruptcy to a satisfactory level. Oh! Then what about those of us who don't save?? So now you know.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

"How do you do?"
-by Sarah Leung

Seated alone in my office, I started munching on crap (cheese ring that is hard to get nowadays & I bloody love it)even though I'm a little worried about the fats I'm putting into my body. Moreover, thinking about my day because I have not really put any thinking into my answer when people ask me "how was ya day?". So Okay is my standard response to them. Well, don't get the wrong idea, it's not for the reason that I don't wish to tell them more but I just simply never think of that before. I mean how do you describe a day that is flat (no bad news yet no good news, no truck-load of work just some admin task, long waiting for lunch to come and office hours to end)? Perhaps those busy people out there who happens to read this is shouting out loud, "hey! you know? YOU ARE REAL LUCKY". I hate to disagree with you but I have to. I never did expect coming to work to see a clean empty desk, laptop with no work-related documents and a quiet answering machine. Neither machines nor me are working. I'm miserable for not having deadlines to meet, no nasty phone calls to curse upon and nothing to eat into my lunch break. Going to work just makes me restless all day long. How I hope I can go back to academic class. I miss the flexible timetable, the noisy yet familiar campus and friends I meet along corridors. What a wonderful feeling! Corporate world is certainly alien to me.

Everthing comes to light now that I clearly know what I want. Sitting in my office all day long is definitely not my style. I love meeting people (Yes, despite knowing 85% are nasty people), I love to work under different environment and I have to admit I never fail to perform in my best when I'm placed under pressure.

It's never dull to listen to people tell me about their day and give them my attention. Usually they need no advise. And the next time they see you, you will be greeted by their most cheerful smile & never miss a chance to stop by and chat with you. Ha! It's hard for me to be annoyed by their complains or frowzy. That may explains why I find it easy to connect with others. Sometimes, it's puzzling how strangers come up to me and start a conversation. But please don't get me wrong, I don't attempt to prove anything here. In fact, I'm just an average looking chinese girl.

Oh! So what's up with my day?

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

"Do you remember?"
-by Sarah Leung

It starts like a bad day, when I hear the alarm rings and curse the early morning. Slowly and unsteady I make a move to the wash room to freshen up (the fizzy hair, stinky breathe, oily face and pale lips)and get prepared for my day of work again.

Just like any other day, getting across to the bus stop is my biggest frustration (as a matter of fact, I have many many other frustrating moments). Think of the heavy traffic, you are running late and there you see your bus drive pass right before your eyes! Or even worst, you run after a bus that waits for no one. But thank goodness, this worst scenario didn't happen to me this morning. I was across the street when the bus arrived. Upon seeing this, I made an annoyance curse to everything on land, sea and sky. I thought I would not be able to get on board. I thought I would miss this bus. Ha! Well, all thanks to the patience bus driver I get to enjoy a comfortable ride to work. He waited for me to dash across the road, tab my card and take my seat before driving off. Not just that, he even acknowledge me with a nod of head when I finally set my foot on the stairs! What a wonderful experience.

Then I recalled what my Mum taught me when I was a kid. "...Remember to say thank you." Opps! I seem to have forgot this basic courtesy that I used frequently on everyone regardless if I get a sweet or not in return. I know that was way long ago when I was in kindergarten yet it shouldn't be an excuse to pardon my rude behavior. Well, we might have overlooked how to treat others right. Stop assuming that it wouldn't make a difference. Sure it does, we are given senses to feel and to be appreciated. So next time take a second off your busy pace thank others for the good deed and remember! Be fair to others, treat them right.

P.S. Thanks to the bus driver of SBS 929, I was on time.

Monday, November 22, 2004

"Hi! Life?!"
-by Sarah Leung

I was heading to the pantry or "hot water room" when a familiar voice greeted me. It was the Malay clearner who is always in bright and colorful make-up, not forgetting a loud voice. She is a nice lady I have to say. In a cheerful (and thundering) voice, she asked me how am I doing. Causally, I gave my lamest & unconventional reply, a questionable "okay?!". But when she started complaining about her long working hours, I knew she is just like me. We are both hit by the Monday blues. Feeling exactly what she is doing then, I cursed the pre-Monday blues that affected me way ahead on Sunday. Ha, what a life, not beautiful I guess.

After that short talk, I headed back to my table with my hot water. While savoring my 3-in-1 breakfast cereal, (quick & easy, well-loved by busy people or at least trying their best to look busy- like me just because it's conveniently packed into small individual packs never for its great taste), I thought if "I am not working, what else can I do?" Damn, once and again that would be hell of a life.

I remember when I was growing up (naive + stupid, they come in a package) I told my Mum that I would love to be a home-maker just like her. Do without the heretic work yet enjoy a stable return of money to spend. Just like a Tai-Tai (rich man's wife), scheduling appointments for hair-do, facial, high tea, majong games, shopping... (you name it, they do just it ha!). In my eyes, they don't seem to be bored of those standard routines. If you ask me are they having a great time as women trapped in their martial status? It might be a different story then. I'll always remember the sad look on her face whenever I say I want to be a Tai-Tai. Well, there's always two sides to a coin, maybe I should learn to be contented and get back to work.

P.S. If only I have work!

Tuesday, November 09, 2004

"Morning people! It's now 9:15 in the morning"
-by Sarah Leung

Stop yawning! n get back to work~ haha... What a way to start a beautiful morning... pulling your body out of the bed, cramping in a bus with strangers, skipping breakfast n log on to your office computer... haiz... This is what I have been experiencing for the last 3 weeks. Sad to say it's killing me to know that this will have to go on for another 6 more weeks! I have been busy the past weeks but today. No work for me to do... I have in advance completed my task right up to friday... n I can't stop yawning!!! Here comes the "coffee man", always come knocking at the door selling breakfast n shouting "kopiii...." at the top of his lungs~ However, that's the fav time of my work, besides lunch break of cos... as I can munch on food to kill the boredom.